The Sarcastic Page

What I really love is the constant neat and tidy condition of the interior of our sailboat. I almost never get frustrated by my futile attempts to keep things put away. I'm especially pleased by my world record 7 seconds of actually having everything put away. I really did not want it to stay that way.

My husband is a neat freak. He never just wants to leave stuff piled everywhere. I never worry that as the boat heels, an item will fly across and impale the hull, causing us to sink. It's ok, I never really want to sail the boat anyway. I'd much rather just have a lot of stuff, as that is the true root of all happiness.

One of my favorite features is having to completely disassemble the settees and berths to "find stuff".

And the best part of all is, wherever you put something, the items easily within reach are never needed, just the stored stuff that is underneath the berths you just made. Who doesn't love pulling bedding out that took 30 minutes of pretending to be a contortionist to get tucked in, looking for a Sharpie or a rubber band?

Another thing I sincerely love is the head. (For you landlubbers, the bathroom, the loo, the toilet.) This is an area of the boat that produces the sweetest smells. Sometimes I just go in there and sit and's like lavender, mostly...and so wonderfully tiny!! Who would not appreciate having the door pop open at every awkward moment because you forgot to tuck your knees in under your chin? 

But not to worry. You have a lot of privacy on a 36 foot sailboat. 

...And having the engine compartment right there in the living space, now, that's convenience!

Diesel smell with your bacon and eggs, yum, yum!

It's especially delightful how every single textile has to be washed following a fuel pump replacement!

Who am I kidding? That doesn't work either. Fortunately, I just love residual fuel smells. 

All this, just for the low point of life, which is raising the sails, catching the wind, shutting down the engine,

And spending agonizing moments of complete freedom and joy.

I just don't get it.

I should have taken up needlepoint.



What I see in my morning coffee